The Not Good.

Still better than a podcast about golf

Coronavirus: More must see lockdown TV

Haemorrhagic Mike (Film4): Mike and the Kings of Tampa contract Ebola in this sexy and upsetting sequel.

Paul Hollywood Scoffs a Dog (Channel 4): Scouse barn Paul Hollywood shows us that dogs aren’t for life but they will keep for about three months in the freezer.

Fucking Comedians Doing Fucking Shows from Their Fucking Homes (All Fucking Channels): Fucking comedians who were on the phone to their fucking agents the minute the fucking lockdown started excitedly pitching a fucking show they can do from their fucking homes do their fucking shows from their fucking homes, probably with contributions from their fucking eccentric and/or grumpy parents.

Hand-Wash Gogglebox (Channel 4): People watch and comment on people washing their hands while washing their hands.